Adulthood is more or less thrust upon us youngsters, one minute, you’re sat at the back of the field with your mates eating your cheese and tomato pasta pot, complaining that half of the pot is actually just water, the sun is shining, your hay fever is kicking off and someone’s got the tunes blaring out of their blackberry curve that’s just sat on the grass and then BOOM! You’ve got your own bills to pay, too much freedom and no knowledge about the outside world and how to survive. Here are a few lessons that might come in handy before you hit that age.
You have a job which means you have money which is great except… No one’s telling you what you can and can’t do with said money which, whilst you might think this kind of freedom is incredible, it can also get you in some sticky situations if you overindulge in a “treat yo’self” attitude and suddenly, you have no money for food or diesel and you can’t get to work to earn more money. It’s a vicious cycle that you’re going to want to avoid. Having a rainy day fund is helpful for both emergencies and those instances when your friends want to do something spontaneous, do you really want to miss out because you don’t know how to spend your pennies wisely?
2. Understand that not everyone has good intentions for you
I know, it’s a bit deep for the second lesson in but I mean well, I wouldn’t want people learning this one the hard way if I can help it. Make sure your friends really are your friends, they should celebrate your successes with you, not envy you. If someone brings negativity into your circle, learn to let go quickly before they disrupt the inner peace and stunt your growth.
3. Love yourself before you love anyone else
I’ve done a whole post on this. This lesson might not be necessary for any high school sweethearts that think they have it figured out but it could come in handy at any stage of life, it’s just helpful if you grasp it early. Always make sure you’re good on your own before you’re good with someone else because you’ll always need yourself before you need anyone else. People should be an extension of your happiness, not your happiness itself.
4. Don’t sweat the small stuff
There’s not point crying over spilt milk, if something doesn’t drastically affect your life, don’t spend too much time stressing over it, if you can’t fix it, move on.
5. Learn as much as you can, whilst you can
People don’t take advantage of free knowledge enough and I don’t just mean school. Use the resources available, go to your local library and read about something new, pick up an instrument, go to school, attend college, get into uni. You might not need everything you learn but it’s better to have and not need than need and not have.
6. When it comes to friends, it’s quality, not quantity
I have very few friends but I used to have a large group which was fun at times but things get messy, words get twisted and before you know it, everyone’s playing Chinese whispers and out of 20, only 2 of them actually ever check up on you. The few friends I have are reliable and supportive which is better than having 1000 friends on Facebook but no one there when you need them.
7. You’re more normal than you think
Not a lesson you think you’d have to take into account, right? And yet, it made the list. This one is more so that you know you’re not alone. Someone has the same sense of humour, the same issues and problems as well. You aren’t alone and you will fit in somewhere, don’t isolate yourself.
8. Talk to that person in the coffee shop
You never know what lessons you can learn from strangers, I know, mum said never talk to strangers but at one point, your soul mate is going to have been a stranger, just like your best friend. Take a chance, safely, preferably in a public place.
9. You’re in control of your own life
All other people can do is guide you but at the end of the day, you’re the only person that can make a definite decision about your own life and what you want to do with it, don’t let people tell you what you can and can’t do or who you can and can’t be. Accept advice, not demands. Unless yaknow, they’re your teacher or boss or something.
10. Make sure that you have very few “What if’s”
At 20, you’re still so young, you have a little time to kill. Take a different walk home, you might see something cool, answer that DM you got on Instagram. Make the most out of life whilst you can. I dropped out of college, twice, because i didn’t want to make the mistake of regretting my decision. If you are unsure of something and get the chance to change the outcome then go do it, what have you got to lose?
I hope you take a few things away with you from this post and use them on your travels towards adulthood. There will be a second part up soon as well so make sure you follow me on my socials in the side bar x